How to manage a counter parent.

A counter parent refers to a parent who deliberately undermines and manipulates the other parent’s parenting style in an attempt to maintain dominance. They prioritise their own needs over the well-being of their child.

Counter parenting is often carried out by narcissistic individuals who hold animosity following the end of a relationship. 

A counter parent can be managed by adopting the following strategies:

Expect their behaviour and be the emotionally healthy parent. Don’t try to “win” against the counter parent. Instead, focus on your child’s needs, and maintain your composure.

Do not engage with the counter parent. Keep your distance and avoid conflict.

Use parenting apps to track schedules, and agreements. This holds the counter parent accountable, and provides proof if you need to go to court.

Adopt parallel parenting rather than co-parenting by establishing clear boundaries and limited communication.

Document everything in writing – Avoid phone calls or in-person meetings where the counter-parent may try to manipulate the situation.